I am so thankful for my marriage. Is it easy? No. Is it fun? Sometimes. Is it worth it? Absolutely!
As of this writing, Anna and I have been married for over 11 years. We dated for about 10 years before that. With all that time we’ve spent together, I would have thought we’d know each other better. Marriage is a journey. Marriage is a quest to know each other better.
Here a few things that I wish I had known before I got married. Maybe they’ll help you now and in the future.
Your sexual drive is OK.
God has given you the desire for sex. Don’t let shame take over. Understand that your spouse may not have the same level of sexual drive as you do. They may have more.
You are selfish, don’t deny it.
Up to know, odds are, you have only had to care for your interests. This will change, suddenly. Don’t wall up.
God designed your spouse to complete you.
This means that you will butt heads on topics at some point. It will be hard and that’s ok. Listen, learn, and keep your love on. Which leads to the next point.
Reconcile at all costs.
When you get married your spouse doesn’t go to a different house after a date. Don’t let things fester. Keep a short list of wrongs and offenses.
Love is a choice.
You can turn it on and off. There may be times that you don’t “feel like love”, that’s when the covenant vows you’ve made will keep you.
“Over-communication” is the key.
Guys, if you think you are communicating enough, you’re not even close what your wife needs. Learn to “over-communicate”.
Learn to listen.
It’s one thing to hear but another actually listen. Listening involves more than just your ears. Watch body language, facial expressions, and hand gestures.