Living Fully Satisfied

What I Wish Someone Had Told Me Before Marriage

I am so thankful for my marriage. Is it easy? No. Is it fun? Sometimes. Is it worth it? Absolutely!

As of this writing, Anna and I have been married for over 11 years. We dated for about 10 years before that. With all that time we’ve spent together, I would have thought we’d know each other better. Marriage is a journey. Marriage is a quest to know each other better.

Here a few things that I wish I had known before I got married. Maybe they’ll help you now and in the future.

Marriage Advice

Your sexual drive is OK.
God has given you the desire for sex. Don’t let shame take over. Understand that your spouse may not have the same level of sexual drive as you do. They may have more.

You are selfish, don’t deny it.
Up to know, odds are, you have only had to care for your interests. This will change, suddenly. Don’t wall up.

God designed your spouse to complete you. 
This means that you will butt heads on topics at some point. It will be hard and that’s ok. Listen, learn, and keep your love on. Which leads to the next point.

Reconcile at all costs.
When you get married your spouse doesn’t go to a different house after a date. Don’t let things fester. Keep a short list of wrongs and offenses.

Love is a choice.
You can turn it on and off. There may be times that you don’t “feel like love”, that’s when the covenant vows you’ve made will keep you.

“Over-communication” is the key.
Guys, if you think you are communicating enough, you’re not even close what your wife needs. Learn to “over-communicate”.

Learn to listen.
It’s one thing to hear but another actually listen. Listening involves more than just your ears. Watch body language, facial expressions, and hand gestures.

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  1. Thanks for writing this! I’ve shared it with my soon to be husband. I like reading things from a man’s perspective. There are tons of articles written by women, but not much from men.

    I would love to read more articles from you on the topic of marriage. Maybe elaborate on some of these topics further – like “over-communicating” and being selfish. I’d love to hear your perspective. 🙂

    • Thanks for the input, Roxanne! I actually have another piece that will post next week with more thoughts. I’ll look into posting some more elaboration on certain topics.

  2. I am getting married in 8 days, so stumbling across this was absolutely perfect. Sharing with my fiance tonight when he gets home. 😊

  3. Communication. Communication. Communication. I can’t say it enough! Even if you think you are a good communicator, you always have room to improve. I think this is one of the BIGGEST keys for success in your marriage. Thanks for your thoughts!

    • Thanks for reading! Communication is the biggest obstacle for me to overcome. Not in “not communicating” but in communicating enough.

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